To You,
Who wonders.
From Jackie Kai Ellis, bestselling author of The Measure of My Powers, Award-winning TV host, founder of Beaucoup Bakery & APT La Fayette Paris, and creator of the advice podcast You & I, comes her anticipated second book — an advice column meets memoir – for Doubleday Canada & Penguin Randomhouse Canada.
What Do You Wonder?
Whether it be life or love, relationships or career, anything from purpose and belonging, to motherhood and identity, Jackie will explore the questions that keep you up at night.
She will weave her own vulnerable stories and continued learning into the advice, so that you know that you are not alone.
Why are Your Questions So Important?
Being vulnerable is hard; it doesn’t feel natural. We all hide what we think are our flaws and sharing these very things can feel counterintuitive. The moment we find the courage ask the question, we realize that we are all asking the same questions.
When we question aloud, we give courage to others to voice the things we have wondered in silence.
The hope for To You Who Wonders is that we find solace, and find ourselves in its pages – our pains, joys, griefs and triumphs. The hope is that we gain acceptance and compassion, not only from reading the stories of others, but also for when we are writing our own.
A Letter from Jackie
Dear Asker,
I believe that the power of a person’s story is in its vulnerability. We connect with stories that are honest and true — ones where the deepest sorrows reflect our own, ones where revealing shame diffuses its power, and ones where we celebrate the author’s greatest triumphs, because they could very well be our own stories one day. I wrote my memoir, THE MEASURE OF MY POWERS, in hopes that, through telling my story, someone would recognize themselves in it. That they would see the depths of my sadness and relate to it; feel my frailty and realize they are not alone; and know it is possible to find courage, as I did.
In my memoir, there is an unplanned chapter that was written spontaneously for a friend who was struggling with a life change. I wanted to alleviate his fear, speak to his longing for a different life. I wanted him to know that I’d had those same fears and longings before. As I watched him agonize over life’s next steps, knowing it was a crossroads so many of us have experienced or will at some point, I wrote the chapter The Letter. That chapter spoke of the anxieties of the unknown, the deepest yearnings for joy in life, the courage to step out, again and again because we know “joy often comes from choosing the things that bring you joy.”
That chapter is one that readers have dog-eared, underlined, and even quoted back to me. I, myself, have gone back to this letter over the years, when I’ve found myself lost again, needing some advice. Because of The Letter, and because I shared my most vulnerable stories in the memoir, I have often been stopped by strangers who read them and saw themselves. In the moments they were struggling with the deadening loneliness of their own depression, I was with them in the safe space of the book. When their hearts were broken, mine was, too. Within the intimate pages of our shared experiences, they realized they were not alone.
Your questions over the years inspired my advice column, my podcast, You & I, and what inspired TO YOU, WHO WONDERS. Exploring them gives me immeasurable joy because I have the unique privilege of holding your most private questions, questions we all have: about the unknown, about finding love, about losing love, about wanting love, about wanting something different. Reading them (and writing about them) is a beautiful reminder of our shared humanity, that we are all not so different from each other, and that one story told with vulnerability can help others see a more compassionate version of their own.
I’d like to say that writing about these questions has helped someone out there. I hope this dearly. But in reality, we do the work that we, ourselves, need most. Since the advice column and podcast began, I hope what I have written has helped you, but in truth, they have saved me. In the moments of greatest doubt and shame, when a mean voice enters and asks me, “are you good enough? Strong enough? Have you done enough? Are you enough?” Those very words I wrote to you about compassion, empathy, urging kindness and gentleness to self, those words answered this mean voice, stood up for me, and silenced it.
As for TO YOU, WHO WONDERS, I want readers to know that the stories don’t just end at the end of a book. I want to write about the life lessons that are learnt and re-learnt for as long as we live. By sharing my struggles since my first memoir – with continued depression, with feeling paralyzed by the next steps in life, with the constant healing that occurs like a slow peeling back of layers – I want readers to know that no matter where they are, no matter how many times they’ve felt stuck, that they are not alone in that too, and maybe we can find a deep acceptance of our undulating journey.
Jackie Kai Ellis
Listen to the story behind Jackie’s memoirs — a conversation with her editor and friend, Bhavna Chauhan.
In episode 15 of Jackie’s podcast, You & I, she explores a question about vulnerability in writing. Since To You Who Wonders is partly inspired by this podcast, seemed fitting to answer this listener question about writing as a way to celebrate the announcement of this next book.
She invites Bhavna Chauhan an Editorial Director at Doubleday Canada, Penguin Random House Canada as her guest. Bhavna was also the editor that worked with Jackie on her bestselling memoir, The Measure of My Powers, and is a wealth of knowledge and a true expert in the field. Listen below or wherever you find your podcasts.
*Terms & Conditions
By submitting your response, you agree you are granting me and my publisher irrevocable, non-exclusive permission to use your submission in whole or in part, in perpetuity and without compensation or credit, in an upcoming book I am writing. I will not use your real name, and may change identifying characteristics or details of your story. You agree this permission extends to all editions and revisions of the book, and in advertising and promotion of the book, in all languages, throughout the world.